Harmony: Did you just post part of me for free?
Me: Very observant, Harmony! I did! People can now read your first three chapters here!
Harmony: Cool! But shouldn’t you have done that earlier?
Me: Probably. But the important thing is I’ve done it NOW! Also, samples were already available at most of the places you’re for sale, so it’s not like everything was behind a paywall already.
Harmony: Does this mean more people might read me?
Me: We can hope. 🙂
Harmony: That smile looks a little fragile, Andy. You okay?
Me: Yeah, so… No? I have seasonal depression. Summer was a really bad time to release a book knowing how little attention a new indie release is going to get. Also, I’m sort of struggling with too many plots in Melody, so feeling incompetent. And hopeless. And I know people care, but it feels like they really don’t. Because Depression keeps telling me they don’t.
Harmony: That sounds rough. Can I help?
Me: Get yourself some reviews? Hell, let’s aim low. Get yourself ONE review. Anywhere.
Harmony: I thought I had stars on Goodreads?
Me: Stars are better than nothing, yet aren’t very helpful without a few words to explain where they came from. And only one reader has left stars…
Harmony: You’ve mentioned you’re willing to GIVE copies to people willing to review me, yesno?
Me: Yes. Hasn’t helped. Although I can’t really blame people for not wanting to do that. I’m reading something I got free for agreeing to review it and… Well, I wouldn’t still be reading if I’d paid for it. So… Yeah. That’s where we are there. I have some blogs to maybe reach out to, but that’s hard to do with Depression assuring me it’s not worth the time to email them, at least not when you factor in the time spent crying when they say no as Depression fully intends to have me doing.
Melody: How about me? I know focusing on writing rather than promoting would be good for you!
Me: Probably, yeah. Except I explored you into corners and don’t know which arcs to cut, so don’t know what to write. And that leads into the hopeless/pointless/doomed spiral…
Melody: I’ve noticed you brainstorming something that doesn’t seem to be part of my series. Would working on that help?
Me: That’s not planning novels. The ruminations you’re referring to are called Suicidal Ideations. They’re Depression’s children.
Melody: Oh. Those sound bad.
Me: They are.
Melody: Well, you’re not allowed to die without finishing me. No one else can do that. And you have to write at least one more of us because Songs of Niaretya is a SERIES, not a duology.
Me: Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.
Fariah: Maybe just hang out with me, your beloved e-reader, for a few days? I know you’re not really enjoying this book you agreed to review, but you’ve made it halfway. You can finish it later or write up a “DNF because…” That’s not what the author’s hoping for, but you know good and well that it’s better than saying nothing. Particularly as a lot of the disconnect is from you not realizing how grim-dark and gory it would be. Someone out there is hoping for a grim-dark gory polyamorous romantasy… Probably.
Me: Yeah, I guess.
Fariah: You have a lot of happier, cozier looking polyamorous romantasies on me already. And didn’t you find that blog the other week..? The one with the SFF Recs with Polyamory list?
Me: I did. I’ve read a few things on that list and were interested in several others.
Fariah: Plus, the reviewer’s added several with a polyamory tag since then.
Blog: And it isn’t like I couldn’t stand some more entries to MY Recommended Reading category.
Me: Yeah, maybe taking off a few days to read will help. There’s more L Rowyn I haven’t read and her books always make me happy.
Fariah: Alright, then! You and Me bonding time!
Melody: And I’ll be here when you feel a little better. Because, like I said, no one else can finish me. <3
